We are all just prisoners here of our own device

Having way too much free time, I have devised a new game with which to while away the hours and stump my friends. I am absolutely certain, in my egotistical but completely endearing way, that no one has ever thought of this game before. Please do not disabuse me of my conceit.

Here’s the object of the game: We (by which I mean you) are going to identify well-known songs by using only the initial letters of the words in the first couple of lines. (Exception: If the song has a verse and a chorus, we’ll (you’ll) use the chorus.) The only question that remains might be what, exactly, constitutes “a well-known song”? I have decided, unilaterally and arbitrarily, that songs written after 1950 are ineligible. Therefore, no matter how much I would like to include the wonderful “Hotel California” by the Eagles (or WTTHC, SALP, SALF) -- it has such great lines as, “We are all just prisoners here of our own device” and “You can check out any time, but you can never leave” -- the rules of my own game, unfortunately, prevent me from doing so.

Ready? Let us begin. And if, after a decent interval, you absolutely cannot figure it out, a click on the song’s composer and year of composition will reveal the answer.

1. JBJBJATW, OWFIITRIAOHOS! (James Pierpont, 1857)

2. MDADDALLD, AKDT,WY? (Milton Drake, Al Hoffman, and Jerry Livingston, 1943)

3. YDWTTROAP, SAFIHHACIM! (Anonymous, circa 1755)

4, WDUTSRFFA, TWMHIYE, TWTOFS (Stephen Foster, 1851)

5. OSCYSBTDELWSPWHATTLG, WBSABSTTPFOTRWWWSGS (Francis Scott Key, 1814)

6. SIWWISTLNDOAS, TMHMR AIAOAWY (Hoagy Carmichael composed the music in 1927, Mitchell Parish wrote the lyrics in 1929, and here’s Nat “King” Cole singing it around 1957)


See how this can go on and on and on? See how addictive it is?

You can check out any time, but you can never leave.

Pssssst!

Perhaps Majority Leader Steny Hoyer is sharing with Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi some ways to convince recalcitrant members of the U.S. House of Representatives to cast their votes in favor of the healthcare bill.

Or perhaps he is telling her the names of people who might be willing to donate money to her re-election campaign.

But in my heart of hearts what I really think he is saying is:

“Jesus is coming. Look busy.”

Padre nuestro, que estás en los cielos, santificado sea tu nombre

If I don’t die before then, Lord willing, and the creeks (or Creeks) don’t rise, this afternoon will make the third Monday in a row I will have volunteered with a local children’s ministry organization called Square Pegs to help some children (most of them Hispanic) at a local apartment complex after school with their homework assignments. The first week was exciting, as I was able to help Rosa, José, and, to a lesser extent, Daniela (because she spoke no English at all). Last week, Rosa was there again and I worked with Carlos as well. I was assigned to work with first-graders. Other volunteers helped other groups of children who sat together by grade level at tables in various rooms.

Unfortunately, I know very little Spanish. Mrs. Sue Nichols, my fifth-grade teacher back in the Dark Ages, taught us to say “Este es el gato” (“This is the cat”), but so far I have not had occasion to use that phrase at Square Pegs. Even though most of the children do speak English, I think that if I am to be of very much use there when more Danielas come along, I need to try to learn some Spanish on my own. (Life lesson: You can teach an old dog new tricks, even if -- or maybe especially when -- you are the old dog and you have to do it yourself.) I know a smattering of words, but a smattering is definitely not enough. Here’s a part of what my trusty computer has helped me learn so far:

¡Buenos días!
bway-nohs dee-ahs
Good morning!

¡Buenas tardes!
bway-nahs tard-ays
Good afternoon!

¡Buenas noches!
bway-nahs noh-chays
Good evening! / Good night!

¡Hola!
oh-lah
Hi! Hello!

Adiós.
ah-dee-ohs
Goodbye.

Por favor.
por fah-bor
Please.

Hasta la vista / Hasta luego.
ah-stah lah vees-tah / ah-stah loo-ay-go
See you / See you later.

Hasta pronto.
ah-stah prohn-toh
See you soon.

Hasta mañana.
ah-stah mahn-yahn-ah
See you tomorrow.

(Muchas) Gracias.
(moo-chahs) grah-see-ahs
Thank you (very much).

De nada.
day nah-dah
You’re welcome.

Lo siento.
loh see-ehn-toh
I’m sorry.

Con permiso / Perdón
kohn pehr-mee-soh / pehr-dohn
Excuse me.

¿Cómo está usted?
koh-moh ay-stah oo-sted
How are you? (formal)

¿Cómo estás?
koh-moh ay-stahs
How are you? (informal)

¿Qué tal?
kay tahl
How’s it going?

Bien / Muy bien
bee-ehn / moy bee-ehn [I think it’s supposed to be “moo-ey.” --RWP]
Well / Very well.

Mal / Muy mal / Más o menos
mahl / moy mahl / mahs oh may-nohs
Bad / Very bad / OK [Really? It looks like “more or less” to me. --RWP]

Sí / No
see / noh
Yes / No

¿Cómo se llama usted?
koh-moh say yah-mah oo-sted
What is your name? (formal)

¿Cómo te llamas?
koh-moh tay yah-mahs
What is your name? (informal)

Me llamo _____
may yah-moh
My name is _____

Mucho gusto. / Encantado.
moo-choh goo-stoh / en-cahn-tah-doh
Nice to meet you.

Igualmente.
ee-guahl-mehn-tay
Same here.

¿Hablas ingles?
ah-blahs een-glehs
Do you speak English? (informal)

(No) Hablo _____
noh ah-bloh
I (don’t) speak _____

¿Entiende usted? / ¿Entiendes?
ehn-tyen-deh oo-sted / ehn-tyen-dehs
Do you understand? (formal / informal)

(No) Entiendo.
noh ehn-tyen-doh
I (don’t) understand.

Yo (no lo) se.
yoh noh loh seh
I (don’t) know.

¿Necesita ayuda?
neh-seh-see-tah ah-yoo-dah
Do you need some help?

¿Cómo se dice _____ en español?
koh-moh seh dee-ceh _____ on eh-spahn-yol
How do you say _____ in Spanish?

¿Qué es esto?
keh ehs ehs-toh
What is that?

Estoy cansado / enfermo.
eh-stoy kahn-sah-doh / ehn-fehr-moh
I’m tired / sick.

Tengo hambre / sed.
tehn-goh ahm-breh / sed
I’m hungry / thirsty.

Tengo calor / frío.
tehn-goh kah-lohr / free-oh
I’m hot / cold.

¡Salud!
sah-lood
Bless you!

¡Felicitaciones!
feh-lee-see-tah-see-oh-nehs
Congratulations!


Oh, and I can also say “What time is it?” (¿Que hora es?) and I know all of my numbers (you don’t really want me to start) and I can sing an entire little song in Spanish:

“Hoy más que nunca, Señor, yo te amo;
Hoy más que nunca, Señor, te necesito;
Hoy más que nunca, Señor, quiero dicerte:
Te amo hoy, más que nunca, Señor.”

Loosely translated into English, with minor word changes to fit the tune, that becomes:

“More than ever before, Lord, I love you.
More than ever before, Lord, I need you.
More than ever before, I want to tell you,
I love you now more than ever before.”

And you want to know something? It’s true.

the sound of one hand clapping

If you know anything about Zen Buddhism (I know very little), you are familiar with the term satori (enlightenment, see Japanese symbol above) and possibly its cousin, kensho, both of which can be achieved, Buddhists say, through the use of koans, little questions designed to help you along the path to the aforementioned enlightenment. One famous koan goes: You know the sound of two hands clapping, but what is the sound of one hand clapping?

I think the writings of the American poet E.E. Cummings (also known as e.e. cummings and e e cummings) are in many ways the literary equivalent of the sound of one hand clapping. What I mean by that is “beyond the reach of my feeble understanding” (I would never be a good Buddhist). Here’s one of E.E.’s e e’s e.e.’s his most famous (and hence, to me, indecipherable) poems:


anyone lived in a pretty how town
by E. E. Cummings

anyone lived in a pretty how town
(with up so floating many bells down)
spring summer autumn winter
he sang his didn't he danced his did

Women and men(both little and small)
cared for anyone not at all
they sowed their isn't they reaped their same
sun moon stars rain

children guessed(but only a few
and down they forgot as up they grew
autumn winter spring summer)
that noone loved him more by more

when by now and tree by leaf
she laughed his joy she cried his grief
bird by snow and stir by still
anyone's any was all to her

someones married their everyones
laughed their cryings and did their dance
(sleep wake hope and then)they
said their nevers they slept their dream

stars rain sun moon
(and only the snow can begin to explain
how children are apt to forget to remember
with up so floating many bells down)

one day anyone died i guess
(and noone stooped to kiss his face)
busy folk buried them side by side
little by little and was by was

all by all and deep by deep
and more by more they dream their sleep
noone and anyone earth by april
wish by spirit and if by yes.

Women and men(both dong and ding)
summer autumn winter spring
reaped their sowing and went their came
sun moon stars rain


Do you hear the sound of one hand clapping yet?

Maybe this one will help. It was published in the January 1920 issue of The Dial and is in the public domain:



I must be making progress. I know the pigeons are clay pigeons.

Maybe there’s hope for me yet.

But since the dictionary I looked in defines clapping as “to strike the palms of one’s hands against one another resoundingly, and usually repeatedly, esp. to express approval,” is it even possible for one hand to clap?

What’s wrong with this picture?

The correct answer, I suppose, is “Nothing.”

This is a photo of Harry Reid, the senior United States Senator from Nevada, a member of the Democratic Party, and the Majority Leader of the U. S. Senate since January 2007. He is to the Senate as Representative Steny Hoyer from Maryland’s Fifth Congressional District is to the House of Representatives. Notice I did not say Nancy Pelosi. She is Speaker of the House, a different office entirely than Majority Leader. Her counterpart in the Senate is Vice-President Joe Biden. So much for getting the details right. Let us move on.

I don’t know when that photo was taken, or where, or at what occasion, but Senator Reid appears to be praying. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (that is, Mormons) he may well be praying. Nancy Pelosi is a member of the Roman Catholic Church. She probably prays also.

A more pertinent question might be, “What do Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi pray for?”

I will hazard a few guesses. The passage of their version of Healthcare legislation in their respective spheres of influence? The demise of FOX News? Re-election? Forgiveness? No one knows, really.

But these lyrics from one of the songs in Godspell might be a good place for all of us to start:

Day by day,
Day by day,
Oh, Dear Lord,
Three things I pray:
To see thee more clearly,
Love thee more dearly,
Follow thee more nearly,
Day by day.

Day by day by day by day by day....

Not by eastern windows only

Here’s a real-life example of what I think the nineteenth-century English poet, Arthur Hugh Clough (1819 - 1861) was talking about in that poem of his I showed you the other day (you can read the poem here):

Fred Rogers’ Acceptance Speech after receiving a Lifetime Achievement Award at the 1997 Daytime Emmy Awards ceremony


If you happen to be among the few people who have never heard of either the much-beloved Mr. Rogers or his long-running, award-winning children’s program on American public television, Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood, you can read about him and it here and here.

And if you do remember Mr. Rogers, here is a message from him to you.

The shortest distance between two points...

...is a straight line, as we all know, except when one of the points is the town of Sheffield in England and the other point is in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

In a comment on the previous post, Mr. David Barlow of Ephraim, Utah, took me to task. He accused me of rambling and even of being a tease, all because I had mentioned Santiago, Chile, and the Andes Mountains and these seemed to him to be unrelated to the rest of my post (which, you will recall, was about my friend Yorkshire Pudding’s trip to Easter Island or, as it is known to its closest friends, Rapa Nui).

What I neglected to say in that post was that YP had left his home in Sheffield, England, in the capable hands of his wife, Shirley, and made his way to Heathrow Airport in London (a distance of 176 miles), where he boarded a plane bound for Madrid, Spain (a distance of 783 miles), where he boarded another plane bound for Santiago, Chile (a distance of 6637 miles), where he did a little sightseeing, and then boarded still another plane bound for his ultimate destination, Easter Island (a distance of 2000 miles), a total distance of 9596 miles, give or take a furlong. In Texas, that is what is known as “a mighty fur piece.”

Something else I neglected to mention was that Santiago, Chile, was Yorkshire Pudding’s final “jumping off point” for Easter Island.

More, I trust, will be forthcoming regarding Easter Island itself from the aforementioned Yorkshire Pudding.

Here is a photograph of chili peppers growing.


It has nothing to do with either Santiago, Chile, or Easter Island. I just threw it in for good measure.